Because I am somewhat narcissistic I have constructed a timeline of what my ideal day would look like. This takes place somewhere in the future after I’ve made my fortune writing books. I am no longer on any kind of medication and I have lost fifty pounds. No, seventy.
10:00 am Wake up in large bed next to Justin, two dogs, a cat, and several Pooh bears (told you the bed had to be large)
10:30 Go to brunch with Justin. We live in a giant bed and breakfast with secret passages and a pool. Rice Krispies for breakfast. Snap, crackle, pop.
11:00 Clock into the office*. Put in two hours of solid writing and do not feel guilty about it.
1:00 pm Wiffleball game with my entire family. Everyone fields one handed so they can hold their (nonalcoholic) beer.
3:00 Lunch with Justin and friends. Board games until a fistfight breaks out.
5:00 Some good old TV time. Chris can make us bacon and brown sugar again. Please?
7:00 Sushi dinner for ten. I don’t know which ten.
9:00 All night blow out concert. I’m talking a wild (but safe) club somewhere where I get compliments from drunk girls in the bathroom all night long. A cup of tea and I roll over into Justin’s arms ready to do it again the next day.
*A word on my office: it really is a playroom with a TV, s bean bag chair and 7.5 million craft supplies. Do with that what you will.
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